Guidance for: I've avoided it so long it feels radioactive

Spend the dread before you spend the effort

The task has collected a layer of dread that's now bigger than the task itself. Every day you avoid it, the layer thickens. You can't out-plan this — you have to touch the thing.

Then, if you have room for it

• Say the specific fear out loud: "I'm scared the email says they're angry." Specific fears shrink; vague ones don't.
• Look without acting. Open the inbox, the folder, the document, and read it.
• If people are waiting, a short honest note ("this is late, you'll have it Thursday") costs far less than another week of silence.
• Shame doesn't speed anything up. If it turns up while you're working, keep working. It has nothing to add.

Watch

• Why is it so hard to do something that should be easy?How to ADHD · 7 minThe Wall of Awful — the emotional barrier that builds up around an avoided task.(opens in a new tab)
• How to do something that should be easy (but isn't)How to ADHD · 7 minPart two: the actual ways through the wall, once you can see it's there.(opens in a new tab)

Read

• How to not procrastinate: task avoidance helpADDitudeOn naming the discomfort instead of waiting to feel ready.(opens in a new tab)
• How to overcome procrastination and get things doneADDitudeSlideshow on perfectionism, nervous-system regulation and making tasks interesting.(opens in a new tab)