Colours dimmed — this page is set for lower stimulation.
Guidance for: I can't do one more social thing
Spend what's left deliberately
Start here
Send one short message cancelling or postponing the next thing. Short is fine. No explanation required.
Social capacity is a budget rather than a mood, and yours is spent. Pretending otherwise for one more hour is how tomorrow gets written off as well.
Then, if you have room for it
- Cancel early rather than late. A message now costs far less than disappearing later.
- Keep it short. "Can't make it tonight, sorry" is a complete sentence and needs nothing after it.
- Take the quiet before the next thing, not after. Recovery in advance works better than repair.
- The people worth keeping will cope with this. It's worth finding out which ones those are.
Watch
Read
- Understanding autistic maskingNeurodivergent InsightsWhat masking costs, and why the bill arrives after the event rather than during it.(opens in a new tab)
- Autistic Self Advocacy NetworkASANAutistic-led. Worth knowing about if most of what you've read was written about you, not by people like you.(opens in a new tab)
This page has its own web address. Bookmark it if it's one you'll come back to.